Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
