dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Can you bring me the toilet please
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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