okay pat passed out under dana's car
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
