..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize