I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
