Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
