Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
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i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
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