but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
