Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I need to sanitize my soul.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
