These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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