So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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