Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
A bitchslap is in order.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
