i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
