So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize