So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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