His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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