Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
