Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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