I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
