I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
