I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize