she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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