It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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