how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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