omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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