This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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