matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
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