is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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