i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
