Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
