he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
splinters make it hard to masturbate
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle