so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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