Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
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