Just cropdusted the office
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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