Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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