Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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