Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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