eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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