I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
