doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
