Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
