This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
