have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
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I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
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I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.