margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.