fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
