so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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