dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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