id be glad to
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize