Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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