He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
It's official drugs can't kill me
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize