So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
