so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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