I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
